Step 04 · Choose

Respond, don't react

A feeling is real information, but it isn't proof. Test the story first, then choose words you'll still stand behind tomorrow.

Choosing your words is a skill, not a personality trait — and skills get easier with practice.

Thought checker

Answer whichever ones bite.

  • What am I assuming here?
  • Could there be another explanation?
  • Am I treating a feeling as proof?
  • If my best friend told me this story, what would I say to them?
  • What do I actually know versus what am I filling in?
  • Will this matter to me in a week?

Something you could say

Cycle through, then edit it into your own voice.

I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed right now. Can we talk about this in 20 minutes once I've cleared my head?